Reflections by Olivia Robertson

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Friends, now I'd like to give you my ideas about the eternal sun that awakens within us. To give some idea of source and manifestation, we may envisage a ring of perfection. Every circle has a center. This may be realized as vortex, matrix, a black hole, a womb - another universe. A way to another universe, you know, people go around seeing dark passages. There are not many black holes though, but only one - a cosmic stiletto pierces folded layers of space, creating one black hole. Yet as space unfolds from circle to spiral there is not one black hole, but myriads as galactic centers. So all galactic centers come from one source, but would appear as numerous. So the universe is both one and all. Go through one of these vortices and you find yourself in a different sphere of consciousness. People are rather apt to leave that out - the consciousness itself is the clue. But consciousness itself - yours, mine, the Gods - produces the appropriate area of space and time. The uncreated flame manifests through chaos, the black matrix. Terror of darkness as being evil, like good, comes from the development of the male, logical mind.

My brother Lawrence and I used to amuse ourselves by noting the naive duality seekers made with night and day, sun and moon, male and female. My brother was brought up in the traditionalist of a clergyman, and I as congregation. To summarize, light was seen as good - the male Deities - strong, powerful, honest and logical. The practitioners thereof rule the world, including lesser races still lost in superstitions - and those committed to their care: women. Nature was to be utilized for human benefit. The saying went: "the last bit of nature man has to tame, is woman."

Darkness was represented as night, deception, witches, cats, bats, the moon. Snakes had been cursed by a Deity who commanded them to creep on the ground to punish them for enticing Eve to eat of the Apples of Knowledge and so bring about The Fall of Man. Although the mythology of all this is today ignored because of the onrush of material science, the habit of thought still prevail. Indeed, New Agers use esoteric "Star Wars" to delude themselves into paranoia - a terror of black magicians, black witches, vampires, and aliens of lizard appearance. I always notice it is always other people who show these undesirable characteristics, not them.

However, wonderful is the Goddess. At the millennium Summer Solstice, I received the initiation of star and sun at midnight. This is the one secret initiation as described by the Priest of Ancient Rome - Priest of Isis - Apuleius, Lucius Apuleius. He described seeing this sun at midnight, which brought forth his spiritual rebirth. This was the secret of the Holy Night. In my case, I saw a sun, very large and golden, with a slight flush of rose. I saw it at the darkest time of the night. I didn't look at my watch because I wasn't in a state to do so, but it was at the Summer Solstice. I think it had curved rays. I knew it was sent to me by Beings, because it was presaged by a star - a flash of dazzling white light, the sort of thing you get when they photo you, only much lighter, you know - flash. So this was a most marvelous experience on the 22nd of June I got that, at midnight or darkest.

On September the 6th, the same year, the sun returned at night and exploded within my whole body. I was vaguely aware that something was around before I went deep sleep and I was woken up by this sun pervading me. I enjoyed it though, I liked it. The star enlightened my head twice. It first, below my head, my skull - the base of my skull - and on the left side of my brain, which surprised me. I thought we always meant to be developing our right, the psychic side. But it wasn't, it was the left side of my brain. It was much stronger than ordinary Kundalini and I knew it was this star what had been given to me.

photo © Minette Quick

Now all this, that was on the 6th of September, on September the 26th, the Goddess who I feel brought all this about, appeared. She was quite short, rounded face, pure whitish color, golden hair cut in extraordinary way, in petals, and she was wearing a white gown, flushed with gold. She was striking a suspended crystal, and this had the power of altered atoms, which I saw was in a transparent pillar. She struck this and I actually physically heard the sound. It was a highish, beautiful sound. I learned that the star and sun needed to be shared with those attending our Temple ceremonies, so I did this, realized all this must be shared.

I think there had been awful puzzles over the word "sun". At Fatima, they said the sun came down from heaven and zigzagged down and drying their clothes - it had been raining. People said "they were all balmy", they were all so desirous in thought of them all being hypnotized by gazing at the sky, though it was a rainy day. Or, they were making it up, because the sun had not obviously moved. But they didn't realize these people were seeing this spiritual sun, the inner sun, they weren't seeing the sun in the sky. This inner sun always travelled before the apparition was of the Lady at Fatima and went away afterwards. That could be more easily seen. These suns are seen by people much more easily than the actual Beings who appear, who either travel within them or come with them.

Within us, is the Tree of Life, you see. Its fruits are as luminous colored flowers or suns, seven in number - the octave comprising the illumination of the whole aura. These two powers, I call them star and sun, have been termed Kundalini, the Indian Snake Goddess. These are Pingala, and Ida. The aim of the yogi is to unite these two powers and so obtain the Great Awakening. This may be seen as the Hegelian triad: these, antithesis, synthesis. Or we may term this balance, Rajas: activity, Tamas: inertia, Sattva: harmony. We honor the depth of Eastern wisdom with our inner Western teachings. We have to be hidden because of persecution. The truth I was given by the Millennial Goddess was both visual and sonic. Sound is related to the spectrum, the colors of the rainbow. Seven could be resolved into another dimension, violet to ultra-violet. Numbers seven to eight.

I was guided to return to the basis of the Isian mysteries. Kem - black - relate to the life-giving, black mud. Two Deities represent this, Taur, Goddess of the ceramic Tablets of Fate and Geb, the male Deity. So we study the mysteries of Isis and how she obtained the secret power - the name of the Sun God Ra. And not only obtained it herself, but shares it with us all.